Still angry
trying not to let it
poison me
I wish you would
just listen
Hear my pain
Maybe it would
get better
go away
If you would just listen
I could tell you how I feel
I might yell, cry, scream
but it would be out
in the air
instead of wasting me away
The truth is never the enemy
Lies kill and truth saves
I can't pretend to be okay
I can't pretend nothing is wrong
I can't
I just can't
Showing posts with label health. Show all posts
Showing posts with label health. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 18, 2014
Friday, February 14, 2014
Okay, Denmark...You've Got My Attention
I once spent the day in Denmark. Well, I guess it was two days, one day coming and one day going. I was trying to get from Helsinki to Lausanne, Switzerland and I had to take a bunch of boats and trains. It was a long time ago, so excuse the sketchy details. The only thing that I really remember is being pretty well broke by the time I got to Switzerland. I ate a lot of leftover bread on that trip. Ah, youth!
Anyway, Denmark has been on my mind, lately. Even before the news of the unfortunate giraffe, Marius, reached me, I had been thinking about what kind of society they had there. Sure, it is a happy society (see this survey) and maybe that is part of what scares me about it. As soon as I heard about Marius I (for now it appears there is a Marius II; note to self: Don't be a giraffe named Marius in Denmark), my mind went to thoughts of the Down syndrome population in that country. In Denmark, like most Western countries, Down syndrome births are dwindling (check this out).
I don't want to get into the whole subject with much depth here, mostly because I don't want this post to go on for days. Suffice it to say that I have a problem with people thinking that this is a great thing. It really bothers me that some people think it's a great thing; mostly, because I have a son and friends and other people I care about that have Down syndrome and I think a world without them would be decidedly more...sad.
So, I just kind of wonder what kind of great society promotes the killing off of those who are seen as unneeded or unwanted or less-than?
What does it say, when a zoo helps to create, names, raises and then decides to kill a young giraffe...oh, and cut it up in front of cameras for the kids to watch. Good times! But, seriously, what does this say about what life means to these people? Life is good only if it directly benefits (read: makes money for) others? Life is only good if you are born the right height/weight/sex/color/creed/national origin/sexual orientation/with the right number of chromosomes?
What did this giraffe do to deserve to be fed to the lions he shared the zoo with?
I've read some of the comments about the subject and many say things along the lines of "giraffes are lions natural prey, anyway" and "you would just have to kill a cow instead, so what is the difference?". I can kind of see where they are coming from. After all, a cow's life is as important to that cow as Marius' life is/was to him; but there is something about breeding this animal, wanting him until he was deemed unnecessary, then killing him that is deeply disturbing. And it reminds me of the free, prenatal screening for T-21 that Denmark offers. And it feels icky. And I get that a giraffe is not a person. It still feels icky.
If you don't love a person with Down syndrome, maybe you don't understand what I am saying. Maybe you think I am crazy. Maybe YOU think it's a great thing to eliminate Down syndrome and with it, part of what makes my kid MY KID. I would ask you to keep an open mind, though and hear me out to the end.
Do you know someone with Autism (prenatal test)? Do you know someone who is gay? Because guess what? With all the genome testing that is going on, prenatal tests are coming for those conditions as well, all in the name of "advancing human health". What does it mean for us as human beings to choose to eliminate traits that are a natural part of the human condition; not diseases, not conditions incompatible with life, but traits that could be seen as less than desirable?
And even if diseases like cancer and heart disease and schizophrenia could be diagnosed before birth, what would we do about it? Since just about everyone will get one or the other at some point in their lives, COULD we do anything about it? What if you found out at age twenty that sometime before you turned fifty you would have a massive heart attack? It's quite likely, actually; much more likely than being born with Trisomy 21. Would you want to be shot in the head to spare you the misery? Or would you want to fight for your life?
Human beings are beautiful because of their differences from one another. One race, hair color, orientation or neurology is not necessarily better than another. Should we, who have apparently "won" the neurological lottery, have control over the fate of those who haven't? And if so, are we conducting our own, decidedly less messy, though no less troubling, form of Aktion T-4?
I worry about where we are headed. I worry that we don't learn our history lessons. I worry that in our quest to become "better", we will wind up bereft.
Anyway, Denmark has been on my mind, lately. Even before the news of the unfortunate giraffe, Marius, reached me, I had been thinking about what kind of society they had there. Sure, it is a happy society (see this survey) and maybe that is part of what scares me about it. As soon as I heard about Marius I (for now it appears there is a Marius II; note to self: Don't be a giraffe named Marius in Denmark), my mind went to thoughts of the Down syndrome population in that country. In Denmark, like most Western countries, Down syndrome births are dwindling (check this out).
I don't want to get into the whole subject with much depth here, mostly because I don't want this post to go on for days. Suffice it to say that I have a problem with people thinking that this is a great thing. It really bothers me that some people think it's a great thing; mostly, because I have a son and friends and other people I care about that have Down syndrome and I think a world without them would be decidedly more...sad.
So, I just kind of wonder what kind of great society promotes the killing off of those who are seen as unneeded or unwanted or less-than?
What does it say, when a zoo helps to create, names, raises and then decides to kill a young giraffe...oh, and cut it up in front of cameras for the kids to watch. Good times! But, seriously, what does this say about what life means to these people? Life is good only if it directly benefits (read: makes money for) others? Life is only good if you are born the right height/weight/sex/color/creed/national origin/sexual orientation/with the right number of chromosomes?
What did this giraffe do to deserve to be fed to the lions he shared the zoo with?
I've read some of the comments about the subject and many say things along the lines of "giraffes are lions natural prey, anyway" and "you would just have to kill a cow instead, so what is the difference?". I can kind of see where they are coming from. After all, a cow's life is as important to that cow as Marius' life is/was to him; but there is something about breeding this animal, wanting him until he was deemed unnecessary, then killing him that is deeply disturbing. And it reminds me of the free, prenatal screening for T-21 that Denmark offers. And it feels icky. And I get that a giraffe is not a person. It still feels icky.
If you don't love a person with Down syndrome, maybe you don't understand what I am saying. Maybe you think I am crazy. Maybe YOU think it's a great thing to eliminate Down syndrome and with it, part of what makes my kid MY KID. I would ask you to keep an open mind, though and hear me out to the end.
Do you know someone with Autism (prenatal test)? Do you know someone who is gay? Because guess what? With all the genome testing that is going on, prenatal tests are coming for those conditions as well, all in the name of "advancing human health". What does it mean for us as human beings to choose to eliminate traits that are a natural part of the human condition; not diseases, not conditions incompatible with life, but traits that could be seen as less than desirable?
And even if diseases like cancer and heart disease and schizophrenia could be diagnosed before birth, what would we do about it? Since just about everyone will get one or the other at some point in their lives, COULD we do anything about it? What if you found out at age twenty that sometime before you turned fifty you would have a massive heart attack? It's quite likely, actually; much more likely than being born with Trisomy 21. Would you want to be shot in the head to spare you the misery? Or would you want to fight for your life?
Human beings are beautiful because of their differences from one another. One race, hair color, orientation or neurology is not necessarily better than another. Should we, who have apparently "won" the neurological lottery, have control over the fate of those who haven't? And if so, are we conducting our own, decidedly less messy, though no less troubling, form of Aktion T-4?
I worry about where we are headed. I worry that we don't learn our history lessons. I worry that in our quest to become "better", we will wind up bereft.
Wednesday, January 22, 2014
Engine Two Diet Part Two (Really more like 17)
In March, 2010, I was lucky enough to spend five days at an Engine 2 Diet immersion through Whole Foods Market (I worked there at the time).
Here is what I wrote about it six months later:
Here is my top ten list of the things I have discovered since the Engine Two Immersion (find out what E2 is here) in March 2010. Six months out, there have been some subtle and not so subtle changes; mostly in my thinking. I have lost ten of the fifty pounds that I need to lose; but I am not stressed over the number. The strides I have made far outweigh the stumbles. So, here you go:
1. Kale is my friend! I never thought it would be. We eat it every day and my husband swears he likes it more than any other salad leaf. Who would have thought? And, it’s not just for dinner; oh no…Kale breakfast smoothies with raw cacao are energy filled and delicious!
2. Reading labels 2.0. I thought I read labels before I listened to Jeff Novick at the immersion. And I was sort of right, and sort of, mostly wrong. Now, instead of just looking at total calories and making sure there is no High Fructose Corn Syrup or Trans Fat in my food; I am now looking at sodium content and fat to calorie ratio. Thanks to Jeff, I will never look at food labels the same way! (Unless it’s vegan cookies…but, we’ll get to that!)
3. Regardless of what the scale says, I know I am doing good things for my body. My energy is high and I am sleeping well. Those are two issues that I brought with me to the immersion that have really improved. I feel like (for the first time I don’t want or need a quick fix) I have my whole life to get better and better at being plant strong. There is no rush. I think about some of the most dedicated plant strong people I know and remember that many of them were much older than I am now before they committed. I will nudge myself when I need nudging. And if I need help, I have so many fabulous resources in the plant strong friends I have made. I am at peace with the pace (most of the time).
4. I cannot convince anyone. This was really hard, especially since I want my loved ones to be as healthy as possible; but, all I can do is give help WHEN ASKED and be the best example I can be. Eventually, the one’s who want it for themselves will come around.
5. Lesson number 4 (above) does not apply to my children! I have eliminated all dairy and eggs from the house. They do still eat 4-5 servings of meat per week, mostly at dinner. They also get pizza on Friday, with cheese and whatever they want.
Why? Because with all of the other changes, I did not want them to feel like they had to give up everything. If they know that they can still have Pizza Fridays, it makes all of the other changes easier to handle. They are eating a veggie and fruit with their lunches and a veggie and kale salad with dinner.
Will they ever be 100% plant strong? I hope so. For now, I am turning them on to all of the good things I am eating, severely limiting the bad stuff and educating them to make good choices.
The post script to #5 is that all of my boys (ages 10, 11 and 14) have grown faster this year than any other since they were toddlers. My oldest, Brett grew six inches and my younger ones each grew four or five. I know that it is the power of kale and extra veggies at work!
6. I am running again. The New York Marathon is in my sights. I am still not ready for 2010, but I know I will be for 2011!
7. I am becoming a fearless cook. When the cupboard is bare I don’t panic and order a pizza like I used to. I always have canned beans; I always have frozen vegetables; I always have brown rice and pasta. I throw a combination of these things together with a little vegan pesto (to die for!) or some low oil pasta sauce or some Frank’s Red Hot and I have dinner with just a little creativity and very little time.
8. I’ve learned what my triggers are. A dozen bagels in the house? Bad idea. One bagel with some Earth Balance every other Sunday? Acceptable and delicious!
Doughnuts? I can’t buy them. They cannot darken my door or I will eat 6, minimum.
9. I can live (very happily, thank you!) without cheese. I truly did not think it was possible. Seriously. Even sitting in the immersion all hopped up on kale and no sugar added desserts, I was thinking in the back of my mind “I’ll still eat cheese, once in awhile…life would suck without cheese”.
But, I was wrong! I realize that without cheese on pasta dishes I can actually taste the rest of the food! The sauce tastes sweet, the added vegetables fill me up, it’s not just a bowl of calories that I’ll regret eating later! Cheeseless pizza? I would have laughed in your face six months ago. What would be the point of that? But, like the pasta, I’ve found it’s what else you put on top that matters. Artichokes? Vegan pesto (it’s seriously my favorite)? Spinach, broccoli, tomatoes, garlic…there is just no room or need for cheese. Sometimes, Friday pizza night comes around and I eat a delicious bowl of gnocchi and broccoli with sauce and nutritional yeast and a big salad. I am full and won’t fall asleep during the movie portion of the evening the way I used to after eating my fill of cheese pizza!
The other bonus to not eating cheese is that it was a huge trigger for me and now it is not an issue. How is that for awesome?!
10. I still have a ways to go and it’s okay. I’m okay with the journey. I still haven’t beat my sugar addiction, but I know I will, when I’m ready. What happens is I sometimes get caught up in this new found love affair with food and over do it. Oreos are vegan?!?!?! What?!?!?! Then I proceed to polish off the package in three sittings. Smart? No. Necessary? Hmmm, maybe? Doing stupid things like this while sticking to a vegan diet is a huge difference from my past behavior. I’m not quite ready to kick sugar and all processed food out of my diet just yet. But, I’m thinking about it. I know I’ll get there.
So, where will I be in another six months? Definitely in Austin celebrating one year of Plant Strong Happiness with Rip, Char, Natala, Jeff, Pam and all the others. I’ll be getting ready to start six months of training for the NYC Marathon. And…I’ll be down the last forty. I just know I will. It’s coming. I can feel it. One day and one bite at a time.
Here is what I wrote about it six months later:
What I Have Learned in the Six Months Since the E2 Immersion...as told to Rip
Here is my top ten list of the things I have discovered since the Engine Two Immersion (find out what E2 is here) in March 2010. Six months out, there have been some subtle and not so subtle changes; mostly in my thinking. I have lost ten of the fifty pounds that I need to lose; but I am not stressed over the number. The strides I have made far outweigh the stumbles. So, here you go:
1. Kale is my friend! I never thought it would be. We eat it every day and my husband swears he likes it more than any other salad leaf. Who would have thought? And, it’s not just for dinner; oh no…Kale breakfast smoothies with raw cacao are energy filled and delicious!
2. Reading labels 2.0. I thought I read labels before I listened to Jeff Novick at the immersion. And I was sort of right, and sort of, mostly wrong. Now, instead of just looking at total calories and making sure there is no High Fructose Corn Syrup or Trans Fat in my food; I am now looking at sodium content and fat to calorie ratio. Thanks to Jeff, I will never look at food labels the same way! (Unless it’s vegan cookies…but, we’ll get to that!)
3. Regardless of what the scale says, I know I am doing good things for my body. My energy is high and I am sleeping well. Those are two issues that I brought with me to the immersion that have really improved. I feel like (for the first time I don’t want or need a quick fix) I have my whole life to get better and better at being plant strong. There is no rush. I think about some of the most dedicated plant strong people I know and remember that many of them were much older than I am now before they committed. I will nudge myself when I need nudging. And if I need help, I have so many fabulous resources in the plant strong friends I have made. I am at peace with the pace (most of the time).
4. I cannot convince anyone. This was really hard, especially since I want my loved ones to be as healthy as possible; but, all I can do is give help WHEN ASKED and be the best example I can be. Eventually, the one’s who want it for themselves will come around.
5. Lesson number 4 (above) does not apply to my children! I have eliminated all dairy and eggs from the house. They do still eat 4-5 servings of meat per week, mostly at dinner. They also get pizza on Friday, with cheese and whatever they want.
Why? Because with all of the other changes, I did not want them to feel like they had to give up everything. If they know that they can still have Pizza Fridays, it makes all of the other changes easier to handle. They are eating a veggie and fruit with their lunches and a veggie and kale salad with dinner.
Will they ever be 100% plant strong? I hope so. For now, I am turning them on to all of the good things I am eating, severely limiting the bad stuff and educating them to make good choices.
The post script to #5 is that all of my boys (ages 10, 11 and 14) have grown faster this year than any other since they were toddlers. My oldest, Brett grew six inches and my younger ones each grew four or five. I know that it is the power of kale and extra veggies at work!
6. I am running again. The New York Marathon is in my sights. I am still not ready for 2010, but I know I will be for 2011!
7. I am becoming a fearless cook. When the cupboard is bare I don’t panic and order a pizza like I used to. I always have canned beans; I always have frozen vegetables; I always have brown rice and pasta. I throw a combination of these things together with a little vegan pesto (to die for!) or some low oil pasta sauce or some Frank’s Red Hot and I have dinner with just a little creativity and very little time.
8. I’ve learned what my triggers are. A dozen bagels in the house? Bad idea. One bagel with some Earth Balance every other Sunday? Acceptable and delicious!
Doughnuts? I can’t buy them. They cannot darken my door or I will eat 6, minimum.
9. I can live (very happily, thank you!) without cheese. I truly did not think it was possible. Seriously. Even sitting in the immersion all hopped up on kale and no sugar added desserts, I was thinking in the back of my mind “I’ll still eat cheese, once in awhile…life would suck without cheese”.
But, I was wrong! I realize that without cheese on pasta dishes I can actually taste the rest of the food! The sauce tastes sweet, the added vegetables fill me up, it’s not just a bowl of calories that I’ll regret eating later! Cheeseless pizza? I would have laughed in your face six months ago. What would be the point of that? But, like the pasta, I’ve found it’s what else you put on top that matters. Artichokes? Vegan pesto (it’s seriously my favorite)? Spinach, broccoli, tomatoes, garlic…there is just no room or need for cheese. Sometimes, Friday pizza night comes around and I eat a delicious bowl of gnocchi and broccoli with sauce and nutritional yeast and a big salad. I am full and won’t fall asleep during the movie portion of the evening the way I used to after eating my fill of cheese pizza!
The other bonus to not eating cheese is that it was a huge trigger for me and now it is not an issue. How is that for awesome?!
10. I still have a ways to go and it’s okay. I’m okay with the journey. I still haven’t beat my sugar addiction, but I know I will, when I’m ready. What happens is I sometimes get caught up in this new found love affair with food and over do it. Oreos are vegan?!?!?! What?!?!?! Then I proceed to polish off the package in three sittings. Smart? No. Necessary? Hmmm, maybe? Doing stupid things like this while sticking to a vegan diet is a huge difference from my past behavior. I’m not quite ready to kick sugar and all processed food out of my diet just yet. But, I’m thinking about it. I know I’ll get there.
So, where will I be in another six months? Definitely in Austin celebrating one year of Plant Strong Happiness with Rip, Char, Natala, Jeff, Pam and all the others. I’ll be getting ready to start six months of training for the NYC Marathon. And…I’ll be down the last forty. I just know I will. It’s coming. I can feel it. One day and one bite at a time.
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