Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Who Needs Rules?

My son, Charles has no use for arbitrary rules.  Real rules, like safety-type rules, he is mostly down with.  At least, the ones he agrees with.  The fact that he cannot drive a car because he:  

a)  is too young to get a license
b)  is unable to pass the written test
c)  has 20/375 vision

does not sit well with him.  If there is a way to get a license, then, by god, he will get one with his will.

Thankfully, I have another year or so to cross that bridge (and maybe move to Wyoming, where his driving probably won't kill anyone).

Anyway, back to Mom's Arbitrary Rules and the reason for this post. We have the same fight, every day over what shelf the acne treatment pads should go on.

I know.  It sounds silly even as I type it.

Here's the thing, though.  IT DRIVES ME CRAZY!  I have them put away, neatly, on the lower shelf behind the cabinet door.  Invariably, the next time I go into the bathroom, they are on the top of the cabinet.  Every time.

My house is not haunted.

I don't have little demons moving things around, trying to freak me out.  Even if I did, I would hope they would do something a bit more interesting than move Charles' acne medicine.

No, this is Charles telling me exactly what he thinks of my stupid rules.  Because, really?  Is anyone going to die if the stupid acne pads are on top of the cabinet?  No.  Mom is just going to go a little bit crazier.  And isn't that the end game?  Making mom crazier?  Because crazy mom is HILARIOUS!

I used to think so, but now I am not so sure.

I think after awhile, after so many years of people telling you that your shoes go on the other feet, that the dirty plates go on the right side of the sink AFTER THEY ARE RINSED, that you CANNOT DRIVE MOM'S CAR, you kind of need to rebel a little.

I want my kid to buck the system.  True, that he is bucking MY system kind of makes me nuts, but do I really want a kid that is going to just follow along with any old thing any random person "in authority" says?  


I want my kid to push back against those who will tell him what he can and cannot do without giving him the why.  Because some of those whys are arbitrary.  

"It's the way things are done"  is arbitrary.  It's also a cop out.

So, buck that system, my Charles.  I'll be right behind you, with bail money if need be.


  1. Mom who is willing to post bail. That is real love. ;)

    1. Ha! Yeah. I figure that everyone should get at least one chance to screw up. :)

  2. This is something I think about a lot, especially as it pertains to Finn. At school, especially, there is such a focus on "compliance," and it worries me. I don't think it's such a hot idea to want my kid with an intellectual disability and limited communication skills to be compliant for compliance's sake, you know?

  3. LOL! Sounds like the kind of thing I would do! My mom is very "Type A," so sometimes I find myself doing things like "I'm folding these towels in quarters instead of thirds, because I CAN!"

    1. Angel you are probably a cool kid like my Charles. :) Us moms want our kids to be strong and independent until it clashes with our rules. :)

  4. I have the unfortunate habit of believing that "Stupid rules don't count."
    You can imagine the predicaments that has caused. It also has kept me in line (I hope) when I am the Rule Maker. Bwahahahaha - Oh, sorry.
    ANYway, looks like Charles is actually trying to make a rule here, as to where the pads actually belong...